Expecting foolish Americans to attempt to migrate to Canada if Donald Trump wins the election, Canada has moved with speed to build a 5-meter-tall wall along its 8000 km border with the US to stop the looming influx of dejected Americans. The move followed a realization that it would not be a landslide for Joe […]
International
The US Election is more of a US IQ Test
Americans are voting today, but as far as the world is concerned, this is a matter of a National IQ test for the country and the outcome could lie anywhere on the IQ continuum. The Great North American nation will be forced to choose between Trump and Biden, and while the polls show that Biden […]
Buhari: Solution to Police Brutality is more Police Brutality
As young Nigerians continue to protest against police brutality, the government thinks that the solution to protests against police brutality is more police brutality. In what turns out to be the most efficient way of dealing with protesters, the Nigerian government has realized that killing all protesters would lead to the immediate end of protests […]
Democrats Test Negative for Sympathy
The senior most resident of the White House – a morbidly obese 74-year-old white male – tested positive for Covid-19 and you would expect the world to show utmost sympathy. Well, it would be a little too ambitious to expect the whole world to show sympathy because nothing good for Donald Trump can come from […]
Secret Service Switches off WiFi at the White House
The Secret Service has moved in with speed to switch off WiFi at the White House as a precautionary measure against the spread of Covid-19. The decision to switch off the WiFi was not meant to get the Commander in Chief off Twitter for a while, as many assumed, but it was actually a precautionary […]
Britain Considering Recolonization of Nigeria after 60 Years of Failed Independence
Nigeria could be handed back to its colonial masters – the British – after 60 years of independence failed to produce anything more than jollof and a unhealthy obsession with North America. In what would be the first case of a country losing independence because they were better off without it, Britain is considering resuming […]
African Union Warns that US is Dangerously on the Precipice of a Post Election Violence
The African Union has expressed concerns that the United States is dangerously on the path to a Post Election Violence, even as the leading candidates continue to trade accusations and spur hatred. Speaking at the African Union Headquarters, the AU Heads of States said that the Two Party States of America were experiencing a worrying […]
Parents in South Africa Announce a Covid-19 Vaccine after Scientists Sleep on the Job
Parents have beaten Scientists to a Covid-19 Vaccine, with The National Association of Parents in School Governance announcing a new vaccine that is 100% effective against the Covid-19 virus. Announcing the new vaccine, President of the Association, Mahlomola Kekana, said that parents were committed to the continuity of education and the welfare of the children. […]
Kenya Pledges not to Interfere in the US Elections
The Government of Kenya has pledged not to interfere in the upcoming US elections, saying that a stable and democratic US is a key ally in ensuring a peaceful North American region. Speaking when the US Ambassador to Kenya Kyle McCarter paid him a courtesy call, Chief Francis Kariuki said that Kenya was interested in […]
How Tanzania Eliminated Covid-19
Very few countries in the world have managed to eliminate Covid-19. Some like New Zealand did it through precision targeting and isolation, and others like Taiwan have an army of epidemiologists who won the war. But it is the unique case of Tanzania that has gotten the world talking. The strategy Tanzania managed to beat […]