Six rhinos were yesterday shot dead at the Nairobi National Park after they were found roaming in the park outside the curfew hours. A report by the KWS spokesperson said that the six rhinos had defied curfew hours, putting them in danger from poachers and other undisclosed dangers. This left them dangerously exposed and resulted […]
Parent Sues International School after Child Scores 96 Marks in KCPE
A Kenyan parent has moved to court after his son scored 96 marks in the just announced KCPE results, although the son was in an international school. The irate parent had spent a fortune educating his son in one of the leading schools in Kenya, in the hope that he would score ‘good’ marks and […]
JSC Commissioners Focusing on Per Diems Since CJ Interviews Won’t Matter
As the interviews for the next Chief Justice continue, the JSC commissioners tasked with identifying the best candidates have expressed their satisfaction with their allowances since it is the only thing that matters. Although it is a well known secret that the next Chief Justice will be determined by forces bigger than a JSC interview […]
Embarambamba to Perform at Prince Philip’s Funeral
Famed Kisii acrobat musician Christopher Mosioma better known as Embarambamba is set to perform in the burial of Prince Philip later this week. The man who has proved that being unique is what matters received the invitation by the queen to perform at St George’s Chapel, in the grounds of Windsor Castle. This will be […]
Kenyan Man Sends a Marriage Proposal to Queen Elizabeth
A Kenyan man by name Wafula could soon make history after his marriage proposal to Queen Elizabeth was received at the Buckingham Palace. Hours after the position of Prince Consort fell vacant following the death of Prince Philip, Wafula moved with speed and used a private courier service to get his proposal to the queen, […]
Piers Morgan Blames Black Elements for Untimely Death of Prince Philip
English broadcaster, journalist, writer, television personality and topmost English Racism promoter Piers Morgan has blamed the untimely death of Prince Philip on some unnamed black skins that could have brought the evil spirit of death to the Royal family. Noting that the colour of death is black, Piers Morgan argued that the grim reaper has […]
Kenya to Repay Loans with Athletes’ Gold Medals
Kenya in a radical new suggestion is exploring possibilities of paying its high loans by collecting all the gold medals ever won and paying IMF with it. “We are unrivaled in the gold medals won…. Those medals are just not things for decorating bedrooms, they are national treasures.” Kenyan officials think all the Gold medals […]
Kenya to File for Bankruptcy
Kenya is set to become the first country in modern history to file for bankruptcy after the interest accrued from current loans exceed the revenue collected by the government. The situation means that by 2022, all the revenue collected by the government will not be sufficient to pay the interest from the existing loans, leave […]
Civil Servant Working from Home Instinctively Leaves Jacket Hanging on Seat While Watching Netflix
Old habits die hard. After the government asked its staff to start working from home, a veteran public servant forgot that he no longer needed to pretend that he is working while binging on Netflix the whole day. The man who has spent his entire career chasing allowances was used to working only when allowances […]
IMF Under Pressure Agrees to Take Brookside Dairy as Collateral for GoK Loan
Kenyans on Social Media have successfully forced IMF to use Brookside Dairy as a collateral for the loans they are about to lend Kenya. Following thousands of appeals on their Social Media page, IMF said that any money they lend to Kenya will be secured using the dairy processing firm owned by the president. Should […]