A study done over a 50 year period involving 3000 Mau fighters and home guards has shown that home guards and their descendants are seven times more successful than Mau Mau fighters. The findings which are obvious to everyone who can count shows that while the Mau Mau paid the ultimate price fighting for independence, […]
Month: October 2020
6 Reasons why Comrades should be the ones Cleaning Universities
Universities spend millions of shillings every year paying for cleaning services, while at the same time sitting on a huge pile of free labor that can be used to do the work. Our research has shown that Universities would be better off if they saved themselves the money and used that free labor. This can […]
Kalenjin and Luo Communities the Biggest Losers in the BBI Battle
Billions of shillings are about to start flowing as the official campaign period for the Building Bridges Initiative kicks in later this month. While everybody will be a loser (except the politicians), it is now evident that Kalenjin and Luo communities will be the biggest casualties if things go as planned. Even before the final […]
ICPAK drops Generally Accepted Accounting Principles (GAAP) in Favor of Carefully Rigged Accounting Principles (CRAP)
The Institute of Certified Public Accountants in Kenya has finally taken the bold step to demystify accounting and ‘tell it as it is’, by revealing the insider tricks used to create the revered books of accounts. In an attempt to help the mere mortals who cannot tell the difference between debit and credit, ICPAK has […]
Journalists Can’t Wait to Break the News of the First Covid-19 Case in Schools
Journalists in Kenya are spending sleepless nights trying to be the first to break the news of the first Covid-19 case in schools. For journalist, each second counts and whoever breaks the news gets all the glory. This is why majority of them cannot afford to sleep and instead, they are spending their time loitering […]
How to Own a Lexus at 23
A precedent has been set in Kenya, where hustlers get to own Lexus at 23 years of age. Dynasties attain the same feat at 2.3 years. If you are feeling like you are failing your ancestors because you are either over 23 and majorly powered by Fuliza, or you are not yet 23 but you […]
John Pesa: “You Get the Sermon that you Pay for”
You are probably reading this from a cheap android smartphone, thinking that Father John Pesa is a category six idiot. Well, we have some news for you, because the real idiots could be you who spends 3 hours online while Father John Pesa is busy building his name (or in a language that you may […]
Fake Hair Does NOT Reduces your IQ by 40 to 65 Points
A recent report from the Association of dreadlocked women in Kenya that fake hair reduces your IQ by 40 to 60 points as been proven to be inaccurate. In a counter research by salonists at Kenyatta Market, it has been effectively proven that using fake hair on your head does not significantly lower your IQ, […]
Furious Kakamega Bred Protester Nelson Havi Neutralized with a ‘Thermos’ of Tea in Parliament
When a man from Kakamega comes to your house raring to fight, the easiest way to diffuse the explosive situation is to unleash a ‘thermos’ full of tea, or better, serve some ugali. This is some ancient wisdom which smart people have always known. It seems that the clerk of the National Assembly Michael Sialai […]
Study: Oxygen More Addictive Than Previously Thought
A groundbreaking study by the Kenyatta University School of Health Sciences has revealed fresh new insights into the addictive nature of oxygen and its long term negative effects on human life. The study which has taken tens of years has shown that oxygen is more addictive than all drugs that are abused by people all […]